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Raul shouts, “Good morning! Howya doing?”
Random coffee-deficient people smile and respond, “Good! How are you?”
Raul bellows earnestly, “Unbelievably fantastic!”

I’ve been observing this exchange for years – his delivery never falters. And the affect is palpable – his energetic spirit lifts people’s moods.

Research suggests that positivity in the workplace:

• Improves teamwork and relationships
• Increases productivity
• Enhances job satisfaction and retention
• Bolsters performance and job growth
• Reduces stress and health issues

The benefits are so critical that a Japanese railway company once deployed scanning software to check that its employees were enthusiastically grinning. Each morning employees were required to beam into a camera that rated the quality of their smile and offered advice on how to look less gloomy.

But research shows that cultivating real positivity is more powerful than pretending.

• Deep Acting: really trying to be positive
• Surface Acting: faking positivity (like forced smiling into a camera)

Deep Actors are positive for prosocial reasons – to improve the workplace; whereas Surface Actors are just trying to impress the boss and keep their job.

So how can we intentionally generate positivity at work (even if we lean a bit pessimistic)?

Some proven deep-acting approaches:

1. Laugh more
2. Gossip less
3. Keep a gratitude list
4. Mentor others
5. Be curious and interested in co-workers
6. Celebrate, cheer, acknowledge, recognize
7. Notice excellence
8. Repeat the good stuff you hear about others
9. Put things in perspective
10. Reframe negative situations into learning situations
11. Lower your expectations on things you cannot control
12. Focus on possibilities
13. Be kind – everyone is battling an inner voice

There’s no reason we can’t all be… unbelievably fantastic!

During each presentation, the Sharks question entrepreneurs about their business model, financials, and strategic plans for growth.

And when an entrepreneur estimates or speculates in response, the Sharks explode in exasperation! They are incensed, even insulted, that an entrepreneur would ask for money based on mere guesses about the health of their business.

Shark Robert Herjavec frequently scolds, “You gotta know your numbers!”

Sharks recognize that guessing doesn’t produce greatness.

Where are we guessing at the expense of our own greatness?

• We don’t know our own numbers.
• We don’t know our people’s strengths, weaknesses, and career goals.
• We don’t know our boss’ priorities and needs.
• We don’t know our customers’ needs, wants, obstacles, or upsets.
• And then we assume others know our strengths, weaknesses, goals, needs, wants, obstacles, and upsets.

Why don’t we know? Why do we make assumptions about what others know?

We’re so busy! Right? We’re putting out fires. We’re consumed with emails, meetings, and calls. How quickly the urgent trumps the important.

But perhaps all that busyness is merely a diversion. Perhaps we:

• are afraid to know the reality of a situation
• dread making changes to improve the results we produce
• don’t want to be responsible for success or failure

So how do we stop guessing?

• for fitness, we have heart rate monitors and scales
• for financials, we have spreadsheets
• for vehicles, we have dashboards
• for people, we have assessments and surveys

But to really own a situation and the results we want, we need to ask better questions and engage in intentional, sometimes unnerving or uncomfortable, conversations.

When we’re committed to greatness, we must stop guessing and start gauging.

To strengthen this interest, my dad suggested that I open the phone book and write a letter to every law firm in town asking for a summer job.

So I did.

Unsurprisingly, I received a lot of rejection letters – what law firm wants to hire a 16-year-old high school student with no education or experience?

Boylan & Neptune did. They created an office assistant position for me for two summers before I left for college, and I loved it!

Cambridge Dictionary defines “gumption” as:

the ability to decide what is the best thing to do in a particular situation, and to do it with energy and determination

My parents believed that formula could be taught, wrought, and caught.

They fostered a culture of achievement in our house – they encouraged us to get ahead by standing out. They applauded guts, ambition, and action. They expected gumption! No wonder I didn’t even question mailing letters to law firms as a teenager…

Equally important, I grew up watching their courage and initiative:

• Without a college degree, my dad advanced from salesman to VP to owner of the company.
• Without a college degree, my mom shifted her secretarial path to real estate (earning Illinois Realtor of the Year!) and then became a managing broker.

And it worked. When I graduated from law school, I landed an interview at a firm. Instinctively, I called the other firms on my list to let them know. I suggested that they might want to interview me too. So they did. And my parents beamed with pride…

As bosses and mentors, what are you doing to inspire and embolden your people to rise to new challenges?

In my favorite episode, Alex chooses Brian Dunkleman, comedian, actor, and the first host of American Idol.

In Brian’s words, he foolishly quit Idol after one season because he was unable to demonstrate his true acting talents on the show. The producers were irate, and he was never hired in Hollywood again – even his manager stopped calling. They called Ryan Seacrest instead.

Seventeen years later, Brian is broke, divorced, and driving for Uber to survive. He lost everything, including his confidence.

When Alex showed up to mentor Brian out of this rut, he:

• explored Brian’s finances, talents, skills, and passions
• uncovered Brian’s interest in real estate
• arranged for Brian to shadow a real estate magnate
• introduced Brian to his CFO to help negotiate his debt

But Brian rejected every idea Alex suggested by unloading a plethora of excuses.

Alex was unfazed – he didn’t take it personally, but he also didn’t tolerate the excuses. Instead, he shared his perspective of Brian’s situation and his expectations.

Some highlights:

• ”You’re letting your life be defined by your mistakes.”
• ”How do you win if you’re not constantly preparing to win?” 
• “You need to wake up every day with your hair on fire, willing to grind!”
• “You have to leverage your PHD – poverty, hunger, and drive. You are poor, but you’re not hungry and driven.”

And then Alex delivered an ultimatum: “Brian, if you’re not in it, I’m not in it.”

After a few days of sulking, Brian finally admitted that his excuses made it easier to hide when life got hard.

As the show concluded, Brian was studying for the real estate exam, paying off his debt, and feeling confident again.

Alex did not have all the answers, nor did he solve Brian’s problems for him. But like a great Mentor, Alex offered advice, perspectives, ideas, encouragement, connections, resources, and some tough love.

Sometimes Mentees get stuck in the valley of despair. But if they could see beyond their own excuses, they wouldn’t need a Mentor!