[Flash] What If It Doesn’t Work Out?
I’ve been training mentors recently who will participate in a nurse leader mentoring program that we’re launching soon.
The mentors in this program are eager to make a difference and slightly nervous about their efficacy. Exactly how I want my mentors – hungry and humble! 🙂 During the training, a mentor voiced a collective concern: I deliberately inquired, “What specifically might not work out?” This gave them pause, so I probed. “Are you concerned that…
When I saw multiple heads nodding over Zoom, it confirmed my suspicion – they’re worried they won’t be good mentors! I offered the following guidance… 5 questions to consider before giving up: 1. Have I persevered in making contact? Engage multiple communication tools until you make contact with your new mentoring partner: phone, text, email, LinkedIn, and feet (walk to their office/unit if possible). Don’t wait or make assumptions before you’ve even said “hello!” 2. Have I worked on building trust? Engage get-to-know-you questions to turn this stranger into a friend quickly. Be curious, find commonalities, and share something personal – your mentee will follow your lead. Through tenacity, we can create connection with different and difficult personalities. 3. Have we identified a goal or an objective? Mentors serve by (1) critically thinking with mentees around goals, and (2) being a confidant when mentees grapple with an in-the-moment crisis. Each situation brings direction and purpose to your conversations. 4. Am I exploring options, ideas, and insights? To support their growth, help a mentee explore options and ideas; then encourage action and identify insights from their results. (And it doesn’t matter if they follow or ignore your advice!) 5. Do I know when we’re meeting next and what to expect? Create a cadence and ensure expectations are clear, communicated, and confirmed regularly. If expectations are not being met, you can re-negotiate your agreement or withdraw your commitment. When Mentees don’t show up literally or figuratively, there is always a reason: insecurity, intimidation, confusion, fear, self-sabotage, or overwhelm – each a crisis calling us to mentor, not surrender. We must make the mentoring experience personal but not take it personally. © 2022. Ann Tardy and MentorLead. www.mentorlead.com. All Rights Reserved. |