[Flash] I Almost Forgot the I Do's - MentorLead

[Flash] I Almost Forgot the I Do’s

Last weekend I officiated the wedding of my friends Connie and Mike. What an honor!

We started preparing for the celebration in 2020. I drafted a script for the ceremony chocked with wording alternatives, and I sent it to them for review and discussion. But when the pandemic postponed the wedding, I forgot about the script altogether.

Instead, I became their Mentor in addition to their Officiant.

  • I recommended that they take dance lessons and choreograph their first dance.
  • I nudged them to hire a videographer (based on my failure to do so at my wedding).
  • I encouraged them to engage in a how-well-do-you-know-your-bride/groom activity.
  • And I challenged Connie and Mike to write their own vows.

Like earnest Mentees, the happy couple followed my guidance, embraced my advice, and incorporated my ideas.

A week before the wedding, Connie sent me an email with the “final” ceremony script. I printed it, glanced it over, and tucked it into my suitcase. While I fretted about my shoes, I didn’t bother with the script. The bride had!

On the day of the wedding, I pulled out the script to rehearse. And that’s when I discovered the gaping holes: “I do” had disappeared, and “with this ring, I thee wed” was missing! And it didn’t appear intentional.

An hour before the wedding, I scrambled to find the bride and groom and offer my most important mentoring. I urged an adjustment to the ceremony, prodding, “You’ll simply repeat after me.”

Like spirited Mentees, Connie and Mike each said, “I trust you.”

I scribbled my changes onto my copy and hurried to the altar to start the ceremony. And as they repeated after me and placed a ring on each other’s left hand, I exhaled with relief!

But I was left wondering, “How had I missed that?”

And then it struck me… I had stopped mentoring. I had become a Wayward Mentor. I offered mentoring when it was convenient for me, but not when it was important to them.

And so, at my friends’ wedding, I also made a vow: I promise to never just do my job when I can also make a difference. 

© 2021. Ann Tardy and Mentor Lead. www.mentorlead.com

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