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Are You on a Streak? (Your Dopamine Would Like It!)

Ted Murphy, founder of marketing software company IZEA, was interviewed recently for an INC Magazine article on how to push yourself to the next level.

His advice? Streak Running.

Murphy runs 1 mile every day, rain or shine.

Murphy reflects, “I’ve been Streak Running since 2015… 1,200 days straight. Streak Running creates a psychological bond to the act of running and to maintaining the streak.

He’s right!

Research reveals that perseverance, sweat, and hard work trigger the release of dopamine… the feel-good chemicals in our brain. So the act of accomplishing something (like running a mile a day) neurochemically boosts our confidence and makes us feel good about ourselves!

While Murphy has created a streak around running, we could apply this streak concept to any activity.

Retired Navy SEAL Admiral William H. McRaven promotes Streak Bed-Making in his book Make Your Bed. McRaven makes his bed every morning in order to start the day by completing a task.

As an author, I find success Streak Writing. Whenever I am producing a book, I write every day until the book is complete.

And to the delight of my dentist, I have been Streak Flossing since January 2005, flossing now for 5,045 days!

Streak Runner Murphy insightfully observes, “Once you cross 50, 100, or 1,000 days straight of any activity, you are much less likely to decide that today is the day you are going to quit.”

With a little perseverance and hard work, we can release a flood of dopamine and push ourselves to the next level: Streak Thank-You-Note-Writing, Streak Birthday-Wishing, Streak Journaling, Streak Desk-Cleaning, Streak Sales-Calling…

So, what’s your Streak? 

Unless I’m Willing to Be Changed by You, I’m Probably Not Listening (just ask Alan Alda)

I’ve been inhaling Alan Alda’s book, If I Understood You, Would I Have This Look on My Face?

Besides having an irreverent title, it’s a valuable book on relating and communicating.

In it Alan Alda proposes two game-changing concepts to help us bridge the ever-increasing chasm between people who attempt to communicate with each other:

1. It’s not your job to understand me.
Essentially, if I’m communicating information, I am responsible for making sure you understand it. If I tell you something without ensuring that you got it (received it and understood it), then I didn’t really communicate.

Bottom line… I am 100% responsible for my communications.

As such, I need to ensure that…

  • I am not mumbling or talking too fast
  • I write clearly and without assumptions
  • I am able to synthesize information (remember: start with bullets!)
  • You have the requisite context for the topic
  • You understand any lingo, jargon, or acronyms I choose to use
  • My email, text, IM, memo, tweet, or letter actually made it to you

 

As the speaker, it is my job to make sure you follow. It is not your job to catch up.

  1. Unless I’m willing to be changed by you, I’m probably not really listening.
    Real communication does not occur if I’m simply waiting for my turn to talk.I need to approach the conversation like an improv exercise.

    This requires me to:

  • Suspend what I already know about the topic
  • Let go of what I expect to happen in our exchange
  • Stay present (not mind-wander or text)
  • Be eager to discover where you take the conversation with your contribution

 

Ultimately, we get to create conversation together.

Imagine the shift in discourse at work and in life if we approached each other with these two simple, yet powerful principles of communication.

It Takes a Relentless Mindset (Post Ride Reflections)

I just completed my Banff to Yellowstone bike ride: 13 days on a bike cycling over 800 miles and climbing over 28,000 feet of mountains.

The scenery was stunning. The Canadian Rockies were incredible. Montana was breathtaking. Crossing the Continental Divide on a bike was a literal and figurative high.

Upon reflection, the secret to all of my cycling adventures can be summed up with one word: mindset.

In Carol Dweck’s exceptional book, Mindset, she describes two dominating mindsets that influence our behaviors:

  • Growth Mindset: people believe they can grow and change through application and experience
  • Fixed Mindset: people believe that intelligence, personality, and creativity are fixed traits that don’t change through application and experience

 

But after my 6th cycling adventure, I’ve decided that there is another mindset that allows me to accomplish each challenge: a Relentless Mindset

Each day, my three cycling buddies and I pedaled mile after mile in spite of sore muscles, screaming sit bones, cold temperatures (42 degrees), heat (102 degrees), rain, wind, trucks, RVs, rolling hills, mountain passes, bee stings, flat tires, and age (two of the cyclists on this trip are over 70!).

It’s on these adventures that we answer only to our commitment and not to our feelings.

Regardless of how anyone felt (tired, sore, irritated, old), we pedaled. We made a commitment to ourselves and to each other to cycle over 800 miles, and that’s what we did.

We pedaled in spite of how we felt.

That’s a Relentless Mindset.

And when I reflect on all the other great things I’ve accomplished in my life, I can attribute my success to that Relentless Mindset.

For twenty years, my research has shown that the view you adopt of yourself profoundly affects the way you lead your life. – Carol Dweck

It’s You Today vs. You Yesterday

At 39 Dan Schulman was president of AT&T’s core consumer long distance business when he quit his job.

In an interview for the New York Times, he reflected, “My view was not so much that leaving was a risk. I actually thought, it’s more risky to stand still.”

Today Schulman is President and CEO of PayPal.

Author Anais Nin is famous for writing: “And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”

But “to blossom” doesn’t mean that we have to quit jobs, get divorced, or reinvent our lives. It could simply mean taking action where once we felt paralyzed.

Simply put, the opposite of standing still is being in motion.

So what does being in motion look like? That depends entirely on you. It might mean:

  • Taking on a new project that is outside of your comfort zone
  • Speaking up when others are silent
  • Saying “yes” without knowing the “how”
  • Going solo to an event or the movies
  • Trying out a new hobby or sport

 

The secret is not to compare your “motion” to anyone else’s.

For every amazing bike ride I do, there are people who are doing even more amazing bike rides. For every one of my accomplishments, there is someone who has accomplished even more.

We can only compare our motion today to our motion yesterday.

Am I standing still today or am I taking new actions, becoming a bigger, better, bolder version of myself? What am I doing today that I wasn’t brave enough to do yesterday?

It’s you today vs. you yesterday.

I’m Measuring my Leadership from a Bicycle

I’m launching my 6th bicycle adventure this week.

Since 2011, I’ve biked across the country, up the East coast, down the West coast, across Iowa, and from Crater Lake to Yosemite.

On August 2, I start pedaling from Banff National Park in Canada to Yellowstone National Park in Wyoming. 825 miles.

Why? Because I love that with my own muscles, I’ve scaled mountains, seen national parks, met interesting people, and discovered corners of the country I would have otherwise missed in a car.

As I prepare to pedal across the border, I’ve been reflecting on each ride from a personal and professional standpoint.

And then it struck me… I can measure my growth as a leader from my bicycle.

When I did my first bicycle adventure, I never really left work. Thanks to my cell phone and my computer, I managed to cycle and kiss worms in the day-to-day weeds throughout the entire ride. My team still laughs remembering how I pedaled over the Continental Divide while conducting a conference call!

But this time is different. I didn’t bring my laptop. I won’t be on any conference calls. I won’t be leading any webinars. I only brought my iPad (to write Flash!) and a book to read.

So what’s changed over the past 7 years? My leadership skills:

  • I’ve improved my delegation abilities and learned how to trust
  • I’ve partnered with my team to hire and expand the team
  • I’ve learned how to develop and empower others
  • I’ve improved my communication skills

 

While I’ll be in contact with my team, I’m confident they will lead… because I’ve prepared them to lead.

I’m always working on being a better boss. Now I’m ready to test my improved leadership skills from my bicycle.

How do you measure your growth as a leader?

[Flash] Do You Lead with Ubuntu?

Ubuntu (oo-boon-too): an old African word meaning “humanity,” beautifully translated as, “I am because we are.”

Essentially, we can only experience our humanity through our interactions with others.

Ubuntu compels us to look after each other with kindness, compassion, and generosity of spirit.

I discovered Ubuntu staying at a Radisson. It was 3:00am when I called the front desk looking for some medicine for a deep cut on my ankle that I had ignored all day. The throbbing became unbearable.

Sheila answered the phone, but couldn’t even locate a Band-Aid. Distressingly I winched, “Then I’ll need to find a 24-hour pharmacy…”

Quickly discerning my pain, Sheila announced, “Wait! Let me see what I can do.” She then enlisted a colleague to cover the front desk while she ran across the street to another hotel to find some medicine for me. Sheila met me in the lobby with pain-relieving ointment, bandages, and a lot of sympathy.

In our short interaction, Sheila alleviated my pain, saved my meeting the next day, and inspired me with her patience, resourcefulness, and benevolence.

That’s the power of Ubuntu!

Like Sheila, in any moment, we can lead with Ubuntu

Once we realize that we are who we are because of (not in spite of) the people we work with, we can intentionally embrace opportunities to make a difference.

How?

  • Listening to and learning about others
  • Mentoring, coaching, sponsoring others as they pursue goals
  • Recognizing, appreciating others and celebrating their wins
  • Being patient in the midst of pressure
  • Seeking first to understand in the face of judgment
  • Going out of our way to help and contribute

 

We don’t get paid for bringing Ubuntu to our jobs. But leading with Ubuntu, we have the power to be not only better leaders, but better human beings.

[Flash] Ask Yardstick Questions (like Einstein)

Einstein said, “If I had an hour to solve a problem and my life depended on the solution, I would spend the first 55 minutes determining the proper question to ask, for once I know the proper question to ask, I could solve the problem in less than five minutes.”

There are two kinds of questions…

1-inch Questions
Simple questions that generate 1-word answers:

  • How are you? Great!
  • Did you deliver the report? Yes.

 

Yardstick Questions
Follow-up questions that compel one to pause and process before answering:

  • What was that experience like?
  • How could we improve this project?
  • Tell me more.

 

Some of my favorite Yardstick Questions:

To mentor or coach someone on an issue/situation/goal:

  • What outcome do you want?
  • What does success look like?
  • How do you think you’re doing so far?
  • Anything you need to be doing differently?
  • What obstacles are you facing?
  • What have you already tried?
  • Where do you need advice, perspectives, ideas, or resources?

 

To identify immediate needs:

  • What skill/experience gaps are hindering your success?
  • What skills/experiences would elevate your influence?
  • What do you want to accomplish next and why?

 

To reflect on the big picture:

  • What problems or situations energize you?
  • What areas of the business fascinate you and why?
  • Where do you want to spend more of / less of your time and energy at work?

 

And then we need to listen on purpose, with curiosity, earnestness, and presence… as if our life depended on their answers.

For answers are like a telescope – they reveal people to us, offering clarity around their mindset, perspective, thought process, aspirations, and concerns.

With those insights, we can mentor and lead in ways that make a difference.

While 1-inch questions are essential for day-to-day transactions, ultimately yardstick questions are the gateway to transformation.


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Are You Playing? (inspired by the movie Tag)

We don’t stop playing because we grow old.
We grow old because we stop playing.

(attributed mostly to George Bernard Shaw, sometimes
to Benjamin Franklin or Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe)

This line was quoted in the movie Tag, which I had the joy of watching recently.

Based on a true story, the movie showcases a group of adults who have continued their game of tag since they were kids… over 23 years!

By definition, “play” is engaging in an activity for enjoyment and recreation rather than for a serious or practical purpose.

When I was a kid, my friends and I

  • went snowmobiling in the winter
  • ran through sprinklers in the summer
  • roller-skated in the basement
  • tossed the football in the backyard (to this day, I throw a mean spiral!)
  • rode big wheels and bicycles
  • jumped on every swing we found
  • played board games when it rained
  • went swimming in the lake when it didn’t

 

Why don’t we play more like this as adults? Perhaps we perceive that as grown-ups we must engage in serious and practical activities. Isn’t play simply an unproductive use of our time?

But what if play actually is practical and productive?

Psychiatrist Stuart Brown’s research revealed that play is critical for connecting with strangers, rekindling relationships, solving problems creatively, and boosting productivity. And it’s a catalyst for joy and happiness!

So how can we ripple more play into our day?

By making time for whatever activities we enjoy needlessly:

  • Jigsaws puzzles, board games, cards
  • Reading
  • Theater, television, movies
  • Dancing, singing, playing instruments
  • Kayaking, bicycling, walking
  • Knitting, painting, pottery
  • Playing fetch with dogs and make-believe with kids
  • Creating new adventures or experiences

 

Dr. Brown compares play to oxygen, “… it’s all around us, yet goes mostly unnoticed or unappreciated until it is missing.”

The first step to inhaling play? Give ourselves permission to play without producing or progressing anything.

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