[Flash] Harnessing Allies: Mentor Lite for When You Face Change Challengers

Wanting to experiment, I decided to order vegetarian options. Immediately, I discovered the joy of plant-based plates palatably and logistically. To me, being vegetarian is easy – I always find something to eat no matter where I go, without issue or declaration.

But it was the community friction I was unprepared for.

When people in my life noticed that I – the girl who grew up on a farm eating the animals we raised and the Big Macs we didn’t – was choosing forks over knives, they commented, questioned, and challenged me:

• Why are you doing that?
• I thought you grew up on a farm?
• What’s wrong with meat?
• Do we need to go somewhere else?
• Didn’t you used to eat steak?
• Aren’t you feeling sluggish?
• I don’t know how to feed you!
• What will you do for food on Thanksgiving? 
• That must be so hard – I can’t imagine!

Today, no one cares that I pass on the meat dish. And in fact, most people in my life have long forgotten that I used to love fish and filet mignon.

So why the initial friction?

We don’t hate change; in fact, we each actively work on creating change daily. How do I know? We constantly set and drive goals. Goals are the gateway to change.

Here’s the problem. While we want change, we don’t want to be changed.

And when we change, it forces other people to change how they know and relate to us. They experience “being changed” and resist.

But instead of surrendering, seek allies.

An ally is like mentor lite – a champion, a sympathizer, a collaborator – someone who supports or shares the journey. Allies don’t require a rationale to cheer. They offer a confidence boost without judgment.

While a mentor is always an ally, an ally doesn’t need to be a mentor. Allies stand with us, validating and encouraging.

Our meandering path is ours to create and discover at our pace. We don’t owe anyone a justification or an explanation for any change we choose. But sometimes, people who do not understand our choices demand one.

Whether you’re changing your health, your career path, your hobbies, or even your outlook, align with allies. They have the power to drown out the change-resistors and bolster our perseverance.

But to find allies, we must first be an ally…

© 2023. Ann Tardy and MentorLead. www.mentorlead.com. All Rights Reserved.