Not surprisingly, “resilience” has been a hot webinar topic this past year.
Naturally, people clamor for strategies to survive their hardships and alleviate their frustrations. And the adversity of the pandemic merely exacerbated the conversation. But resilience is not about survival. Resilience happens when we transform through a situation, not when we endure or avoid it. Resilience is indifferent to circumstances and distress: it cares only about your next move. One of my favorite Peloton instructors, Tunde Oyeneyin, announced during a workout yesterday, “The pain you feel right now will show up as strength tomorrow.” And Buddha taught, “Life is suffering.” Although they sound despondent, these pronouncements teem with potential! For it’s impossible to stretch, strengthen, and sprout when life is effortless. (How much growth have you experienced on vacation basking in the sun, reading a trashy novel, drinking a margarita by the pool?) Understandably, great bosses and meaningful mentors are careful not to save their people from suffering. Instead, they intentionally challenge people to explore and progress. Because that’s how muscles grow; that’s how confidence blossoms; that’s how leaders emerge. Roman emperor and Stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius wrote, “When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous, and surly.” (and that was centuries before social media!) Again, potential disguised as despair. Mean people offer us exceptional moments to improve our discernment, our emotional intelligence, our patience, our empathy, our humanity, and our power to be decent in the face of indecency. Nasty people like nasty circumstances are inevitable. Instead of trying to temper the dreadful, eagerly embrace the opportunity to augment your skills and grow forward! You’re going to be a bigger, better, bolder version of yourself… because you evolved through it instead of escaped from it. Tunde also likes to tease, “You get stronger by getting stronger.” That’s resilience. © 2021. Ann Tardy and Mentor Lead. www.mentorlead.com | www.anntardy.com |