[Flash] Where'd You Go, Mentee? - MentorLead

[Flash] Where’d You Go, Mentee?

The people most in need of mentoring tend to decline the opportunity. And the people least in need of mentoring are the ones who seek it,” according to researchers at Harvard and Tulane.

Why?
The researchers surmise that those who pass up the experience are reluctant out of insecurity or an inflated sense of their abilities – they don’t believe they need any help.

The researchers argue that because of the enormous ROI that mentoring can generate, mentoring programs should be mandatory.

I disagree (and wonder if the researchers confused mentoring with training, precepting, or apprenticing).

First, no one “needs” mentoring – it’s not intended to be remedial. Instead, it’s the chance to connect, grow, expand, collaborate, and strengthen. 

Second, mandatory mentoring dilutes the ownership aspect of mentoring that fuels its power.

Finally, people eschew mentoring for only two reasons:

  1. They don’t know how
  2. They don’t know why

The “don’t know why” is an enormous barrier (in all areas of life!). If people don’t have a compelling reason (a goal, an aspiration, a commitment, an expectation to participate), they will choose other ways to spend their time.

5 reasons people ignore the invitation to be mentored:

  1. Confusion (they don’t know how, what, where, when, or who)
  2. No compelling reason (they don’t know why)
  3. Already have a mentor (they don’t know why they need another one)
  4. Overwhelm/time-challenged (they don’t know how to make it work)
  5. Fear (which results from their don’t-know-how-or-why)

Potential Mentees! Before you overlook the opportunity to be mentored, ask yourself and others these discerning questions to explore your don’t-know-how-or-why barriers…

  • What is the purpose or goal of the mentoring program?
  • How would it contribute to my goals? (What are my goals?)
  • Logistically, how can I participate?
  • What would make it a success for me?
  • Mentor, how did you leverage mentoring when you were in my role?
  • How can I grow from this experience?
  • Who could I meet? What could I learn?
  • How will participating (or not) reflect on my reputation and commitment to connect, collaborate, contribute, and lead? 

While program leaders can improve how they engage mentees, potential mentees can improve how they engage themselves.

© 2022. Ann Tardy and MentorLead. www.mentorlead.com. All Rights Reserved.

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