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Last year, while my husband battled a rare form of cancer, he announced that the Grand Canyon was on his “bucket list.” His two college best friends and their spouses immediately shouted, “Let’s go!”
It wasn’t an empty someday-we-should-do-that promise. It was a commitment in honor of 40 years of friendship. A date was set; plane tickets were purchased. No hesitation. No excuses. All in! Planning the adventure gave my guy a distraction during chemo. He extensively researched and created an itinerary chock-full of reservations for tours, hikes, cabins, and dinners in Sedona, the Grand Canyon, and Phoenix. But the day before we left, his oncologist delivered the news that his most recent scan showed a potential new issue. Additional tests would be needed upon our return. The uncertainty of his health weighed heavily on us as we boarded the plane and met his friends at the airport. When he shared the unsettling news, the group was visibly shaken. The fear of the future was threatening our time together. I suddenly recalled the phrase “Be where your feet are.” Coined by Scott O’Neil, author of the book by the same name, this mantra invites us to focus on the people and the moment directly in front of us instead of mentally living somewhere else. I needed to ensure we did not miss these friends and this moment. So, for the entire week, whenever I witnessed worry walk across my husband’s face, I pounded on the table and shouted, “Hey! Where are your feet?” Returning to us, he tentatively responded, “Right here.” I then encouraged, “Great! Join them!” Soon, we were all reminding each other, “Be where your feet are!” Each time someone mentioned Monday morning or some other future event, someone else would yell, “Find your feet! Find your feet!” The result?
Being where my feet are, I discovered a deep appreciation for the value of investing time and energy in creating the present with people who are important to me. While we don’t yet know the results of any tests or what the future holds, I’m not going to miss this moment worrying about the next one. I found my feet. And I’ll continue to nudge my husband to find his, too. © 2026. Ann Tardy and MentorLead. www.mentorlead.com. All Rights Reserved. |