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When I asked Harvey if he had a Mentor, he eagerly shared, “Yes! Whenever I need guidance, I approach leaders with, ‘I want to get from Point A to Point B. How do I get there?’”
Simple and straightforward! The challenge? Everyone knows Point A (where they’re starting), but most people struggle to identify a Point B – where they’re headed. Every year, we conduct a survey to ascertain why people feel they don’t yet have a Mentor. And consistently, the number one answer is: “I don’t know what to focus on with a Mentor.” Their Point B is murky. Having a Mentor sounds appealing, but without the beacon of a Point B, people lack a compelling reason to reach out for support. They don’t have a why. Scott Galloway, Professor of Marketing at NYU Stern School of Business, offered the following counsel to his students: “I’m blessed with a ton of Mentors because I would ask them out for coffee and then ask them a lot of questions. I asked for their advice and their feedback.” And the managing partner of SkyBridge Capital shared a similar strategy. When he was looking for his first job after college, he would wait in line to talk with a conference speaker and then boldly ask: “Could I come see you? Could I drive you to the airport instead of you taking a cab? Could I buy you a cup of coffee?” While I love a strategic coffee-for-advice date, it presupposes a potent need for advice – a goal, an aspiration, a Point B, a why. So start there. Figure out where you want to go. Then find people who are already there and ask them about their journey. To identify a Point B:
When you can see a Point B, your confidence will soar! You will courageously (even brazenly!) ask people for their advice, a connection, a resource, or a suggestion as you aim in a particular direction. And you’ll bring purposeful questions to generate relevant advice, guidance, and perspectives. But you also reserve the right to change your Point B. You’re exploring routes in these conversations – your future will not ride or die on a coffee date. You’re simply (yet profoundly!) collecting wisdom. Get focused. Create a Point B. Then start ordering coffee! © 2025. Ann Tardy and MentorLead. www.mentorlead.com. All Rights Reserved. |